From AsianWeek's AskQ
Dear Q,
My boyfriend and I disagree on politics. It’s the only issue that we have consistently argued about during our eight-year relationship. I’m a white guy, and he’s a Republican, assimilated Chinese American. I find it despicable that he would vote for that party, no matter the candidate — and with this election, he’s become even more inflexible. Two weeks ago, after an argument, I hit him, half by accident, half for real. I couldn’t believe it and apologized, but he refuses to talk to me about it. We’re not breaking up, but he’s really hurt. When I asked how to make up for it, he said I have to vote Republican in the general election. Obviously, I’m not doing that, but he seems determined to punish me by making me do something fundamentally against my principles; this is all that he’ll accept as an apology.
This feels very twisted and maybe one for the gone-too-far department. What’s a good way to compromise? Believe it or not, I actually love this guy.
— A Democrat Until Death
Dear DUD,
I just don’t think gays should be Republican, not even for fiscal reasons. Dump your boyfriend. If you aren’t willing to do that, you have to stop hitting him. Why don’t you just campaign harder for your candidate? There’s nothing that entitles your BF-(R) to stop you from being a constructive part of the national election. Under the category of agree to disagree, let him vote however he wants. And if you won’t switch parties, then it’s not fair to expect the same from him. Maybe he likes watching Republicans come out of the closet or voting against the possibility of ever marrying you. Blackmail isn’t ever healthy in a relationship. Your BF can’t be serious about forcing your vote, but if he insists, just go into the booth and do your business. If he asks who you voted for, you can 1) lie, 2) say it’s your right to keep it confidential or 3) hit him again with full force. I just hope the make-up sex is worth all this.
QueerGam: I totally agree! Go vote in November and lie about it! Cos he is asking for it (by forcing you). He is not going to know anyway! He is kinda stupid (by forcing you to vote for McCain). But you are more stupid -- by hitting the guy you love! But love is stupid so... My ex white BF once hit the door and broke his wrist because he couldn't and wouldn't hit me. And when we made love that night I told him I'd have taken the blow instead (but I'd leave him no matter what!) He cried and apologized for almost hitting me. And he promised me not to ever hit anything in front me again. Result: he hurt his wrist for months. Love hurts. So be a real man, grow a spine and grow up and stop hitting your BF. A white friend of mine cheats on and slaps his Asian BF whenever they fight...the Asian guy is so immune to it. Asian guys love to be treated that way! I have a lot of Asian friends who let their white BFs -- cheating them, using them, humiliating them, and even hitting them. Asian gay men are so forgiving! Crazy.
Dear Q,
My boyfriend and I disagree on politics. It’s the only issue that we have consistently argued about during our eight-year relationship. I’m a white guy, and he’s a Republican, assimilated Chinese American. I find it despicable that he would vote for that party, no matter the candidate — and with this election, he’s become even more inflexible. Two weeks ago, after an argument, I hit him, half by accident, half for real. I couldn’t believe it and apologized, but he refuses to talk to me about it. We’re not breaking up, but he’s really hurt. When I asked how to make up for it, he said I have to vote Republican in the general election. Obviously, I’m not doing that, but he seems determined to punish me by making me do something fundamentally against my principles; this is all that he’ll accept as an apology.
This feels very twisted and maybe one for the gone-too-far department. What’s a good way to compromise? Believe it or not, I actually love this guy.
— A Democrat Until Death
Dear DUD,
I just don’t think gays should be Republican, not even for fiscal reasons. Dump your boyfriend. If you aren’t willing to do that, you have to stop hitting him. Why don’t you just campaign harder for your candidate? There’s nothing that entitles your BF-(R) to stop you from being a constructive part of the national election. Under the category of agree to disagree, let him vote however he wants. And if you won’t switch parties, then it’s not fair to expect the same from him. Maybe he likes watching Republicans come out of the closet or voting against the possibility of ever marrying you. Blackmail isn’t ever healthy in a relationship. Your BF can’t be serious about forcing your vote, but if he insists, just go into the booth and do your business. If he asks who you voted for, you can 1) lie, 2) say it’s your right to keep it confidential or 3) hit him again with full force. I just hope the make-up sex is worth all this.
QueerGam: I totally agree! Go vote in November and lie about it! Cos he is asking for it (by forcing you). He is not going to know anyway! He is kinda stupid (by forcing you to vote for McCain). But you are more stupid -- by hitting the guy you love! But love is stupid so... My ex white BF once hit the door and broke his wrist because he couldn't and wouldn't hit me. And when we made love that night I told him I'd have taken the blow instead (but I'd leave him no matter what!) He cried and apologized for almost hitting me. And he promised me not to ever hit anything in front me again. Result: he hurt his wrist for months. Love hurts. So be a real man, grow a spine and grow up and stop hitting your BF. A white friend of mine cheats on and slaps his Asian BF whenever they fight...the Asian guy is so immune to it. Asian guys love to be treated that way! I have a lot of Asian friends who let their white BFs -- cheating them, using them, humiliating them, and even hitting them. Asian gay men are so forgiving! Crazy.
Comments
Post a Comment
What do you think?